Seiji, What Are You Doing?
by Rowen Hashiba Of Tenku Co
Summary: Touma Finds Seiji About To Make A Wrong Choice- Can He Help His Best Friend?


Seiji, What Are You Doing?  
By Fallon Sanada  
  
~*Whatever I do to Seiji and Touma, they are my favorite characters. Just know that. Know that even though I torture them I love them. That is all.*~  
  
  
  
  
Touma was tired. He had been at the library all afternoon, and had read since he had gotten home. He wanted to go to sleep. So he walked upstairs to the room that he and Seiji shared.  
He knocked on the door once, sharply, to make sure that Seiji wasn't in there changing or something. He heard a muffled "Go away", and decided that something was wrong. The voice, Seiji, sounded like he was crying. As far as Touma knew, Seiji never cried.  
Opening the door slowely, he looked around. Seiji sat on the edge of the green blanket on his bed, a knife in one hand, and blood on the floor. His wrist was cut, but not deeply.  
"Seiji, what are you doing?" Touma asked quietly, not wanting to spook the boy.  
Seiji looked up at him, surprised, tears glittering in the one eye that Touma could see, the trails left by previous sobs leading down his cheeks.  
"I said go away.." Seiji said, holding in a sob of anguish. Touma walked over to his friend, who tensed up instantly, as though Touma were going to hurt him.  
*No more than he's hurting himself..* Touma thought silently.  
"Seiji, I'm not going to let you hurt yourself." Touma said firmly, although sobs threatened him, "Why are you doing this?"  
Seiji paused, looking up towards his best friend, wanting so badly to know that someone cared.  
"I just can't take it..." Seiji said softly, putting the knife down on the bed for a moment.  
"What can't you take?" Touma asked, hoping that he wouldn't start crying right then and there.  
Seiji had been acting strange lately....  
(FLASHBACK)  
Seiji walked in, looking like he had been in a fight or something.  
"What's wrong?" Touma asked, frowning to see his friend's condition.  
"Nothing." Seiji replied, rubbing a slight cut on his cheek, "I'm fine."  
"You don't look fine.." Ryo commented.  
"I'm just fine." Seiji repeated.  
"Come on, Seiji. You haven't been the same since you went to America.." Shin said in his quiet manner. Seiji shook his head.  
"You guys, I'm fine..." He said, "Don't worry about me, okay?"  
And he had gone up to his room, slamming the door shut behind him.  
Later on, Touma had went up to his and Seiji's room, to see what was going on.  
"Seiji, what really happened?" He asked his friend.  
"I got into a fight." Seiji replied.  
"Unarmed, against some guy with a knife?" Touma asked sarcastically, "I think you're smarter than that."  
"You're right." Seiji said, "Per usual."  
"What do you mean, 'You're right'?" Touma asked.  
"You're correct. I didn't get into a fight."  
"You don't mean to tell me... You did this to yourself?"  
(END FLASHBACK)  
Three days after that, at a meeting with a psyciatrist (Shin had signed him up, causing Seiji to comment on how much the name Shin sounded like 'sin') he was diagnosed with clinical depression. It had been four days since then.  
"Life." Seiji replied, finally shaking Touma out of his thoughts.  
"Huh?" Touma wasn't sure he understood, "Why?"  
"Everything that's happened, everything that I know is going to happen..." Seiji began, "It's hard.. I'm afraid to go to sleep... The nightmares..."  
"What nightmares?" Touma ventured to ask. Seiji looked at him again, then quickly away, as though embaressed.  
"Every time I close my eyes.. I see it." Seiji said, "The darkness attacking, and you guys are all gone... Except that I'm there, and, I don't know.... It looks like I'm... Like I'm hurting you guys like I did in New York.."  
"Hey, no. That wasn't your fault. You were being controlled. I don't know about any nightmares.."  
"My dreams... Sometimes they're premonitions.. Visions.."  
"So what if they are? You don't have to kill yourself over it!"  
"But, it's my fault.."  
"Who says?" Touma asked, concerned.  
"I do!" Seiji said, looking up at Touma with anger in his eyes, "I don't want to hurt you guys!"  
"Seiji, please... Don't hurt yourself anymore... We care about you. Don't want you to go.."  
Touma was dangerously close to tears. Seiji looked at him with a puzzled expression.  
"I didn't really... Really think that anyone cared what happened to me.." The blonde revealed.  
"We all do!" Touma said, "C'mon, now, let's get that cleaned up, put the knife away, and we can just pretend this never happened, okay? Everything'll be alright."  
Seiji put his head in his hands, weeping. Touma put his hand on his shoulder.  
"How can everything be alright? After this?" Seiji asked, his voice muffled and shaking.  
"Hey, the others don't even have to know about this, okay? It'll be our secret. We just need to get this taken care of, alright?" Touma said, a forced grin illuminating his face.  
"Alright." Seiji replied, standing up weakly.  
Touma took his friend by his un-injured hand and led him to the bathroom, where the first-aid kit was.  
  
  
=END= 


End file.
